I was recently reminded by one of my female college friends about her rape by another student.  Since this was around 35 years ago, it immediately made me think of Dr. Ford and her assault.  Honestly I had forgotten my friend’s rape.  I know how bad this sounds, but it clearly never came up in my mind anytime in lets say, the last 25 to 30 years.

It occurred after a party I attended.  The rapist was someone I had seen in the college bar  scene. To say I knew him socially would be a vast exaggeration. We were vague acquaintances.  The rape occurred after I had left the party. She told me about it some months later. Being a college student, I am sure I tried to offer some good advice but I am not even sure what advice I gave.  I knew I was angry and hurt and my male pride was injured that I was there and could not protect her.  I believe I offered to go and hurt the rapist, but she asked me not to, and also asked me not to tell.

So there it lay.  Now, however, like Dr. Ford I try to put the pieces back together.  I would tell you  his name, but I honestly don’t remember it.  I have a hard time coming up with his physical description, long brown hair, a white guy.   We drove back and forth to the party. Where was it? I didn’t drive? Who drove? What car?  What was the house like? Vague memories of white paint.  A kitchen but I spent lots of times at parties in kitchens.  What year?  Maybe my freshman year, maybe my Sophomore year, probably not my Junior year, because I think I remember walking away from town after she told me.  What time of year? I think I remember winter. Of course going to college in Western NY, that could be either the Fall or Spring semesters.

Now if I could talk with others, I could probably narrow down the possibilities, and I am sure she remembers more.  But that is the way memory works.

Which brings us to the news media and politics.  Memory science is not an unknown factor.  There are many researchers who could totally have testified to a Congress that actually cared about memory. There are sex abuse experts who could totally have testified lucidly and knowledgeable about memory and PTSD.  There are other people who could have testified about events surrounding Dr.  Ford, and Judge Kavanaugh, as well as about what happened to my friend. That may have totally have aided my memory and recall.  But they were never asked, the microphone was silent. There was no desire to seek out the truth or to learn the facts.  The whole thing was an orchestrated sham.

So what then about the news media?  I assume that some reporters interviewed some of these experts.  I never saw those reports or news stories, in the pages and pages and hours of coverage I listened to.  I heard lots of she said, he said, and lots of character assignations.  I did not really see, read, or hear a news media that had a strong desire to uncover and report that truth.  The fact is in terms of the X files, “the truth is out there”.  So where are the politicians and reporters who actually want to find it, uncover it, learn it, and in the case of the news media, report it.

 

© by Dan DeMarle 2018