The way out of situations is to recognize that there is reality but reality is perceived differently by every participant. It’s even as simple as the fact that someone who is color-blind sees the world differently than someone who is not. The way out of a situation isn’t to force one view of reality on others but to find the common threads as the beginning of a way to bring a new shared view into a hopefully better-shared reality. This is what South Africa did with its Truth and Reconciliation Committee. Because at the end of the day, there is no greater right or greater wrong, there is just conflict and death. One can always point fingers and try to say you are guilty or more guilty than me, “I did this because you did that”, “Well I did that because you did this.” “Well…” but the dead do not care, nor do the soon-to-be dead. Sadly some think that death is an acceptable response, which is quickly followed with just not our dead. I do not hold that view.